By
Martin Handy
Bakewell, Derbyshire
10-14 July 2023
It is always a difficult transition to returning home again after another awe-inspiring spiritual break with a deeply aware and present devotee of the Presence and Stillness within: Mr John Butler. This is the first time I have met John Butler in the flesh, in this time and space.
I am always very moved after being with spiritual seekers for a few days and this was no exception. I always feel completely opened-up in my spiritual being as well as my psychological and physical being. Being with like-minded people is so good but when one goes back home and into the world of work and materiality there are strong feelings of sadness too, grief as well, for having to leave the presence of spiritual folk and back to materially minded folk. I sometimes refer to it as a spiritual hangover! It takes some time to reintegrate. Writing is part of that integration for me. So here goes…
I arrived in Bakewell Monday afternoon on a July sunny afternoon. The town bustles with activity and purpose. After just catching my breath after the four hour journey from Hampshire, parking my car in Yeld Road at the top of the hill where the church is, I walked down the very steep hill into the town and went to The Chakra Lounge, the local Indian café for their famous Masala Chai Tea and a slice of vegan carrot cake which was just yummy, I read some of John’s poetry book, volume 2, Do You Pray for Me?
Poem 30
Total absorption. Union.
Absolute completion, witnesses
Divinity outpour into creation,
Forget itself through separation
And, from enough, insatiably desired,
Eventually grow tired
For final re-solution, in salvation
And a new beginning –
John’s writing and talks are very integrated on so many levels. They attract a great many people, young and old. This really makes a mark on me; that the people who come to be with John are so young too. We live in a time when it is very unusual to see young people attracted to the spiritual life; I was surrounded by their energy and passion. It was refreshing to talk with them about their disillusionment with material life and a desire to find more meaning spiritually. John offers deeper meaning in this regard, than many of the church leaders I have met. He connects people to something that is within us. He shows us what the first law is really made of, ‘to love our God with all our mind, all our strength’. He calls it the Presence within, the Stillness. He makes it real and shows us how to connect with it. John teaches the true teaching where so many institutions have failed. He brings us to this Presence. Many of us are learning to connect to this Stillness, peace, love, God and in doing so the Presence comes into the world through our love, the way we talk and the things we try and do. This becomes the struggle of the spiritual aspirant to bring this into the world in our relationships and work with people and the planet and all living things. It was through John’s videos on YouTube and his books that I came to know that Way he talks about. His poetry book helped me connect to him and what he is connected to. I finished my Masala Chai tea and made my way to the church for afternoon meditation and meeting John for the first time!
I walked back up to the church, a steep walk from the town centre and I catch my breath again at the church doors before going in. My leg muscles burned. It was almost time for afternoon meditation at 4pm. The church was nice and cool inside after the hot walk up the hill. I turned back towards the door and saw John coming up the path. It was him. “Hi John. I’m Martin”. We shook hands. I was very emotional. After a year or more of reading his books and watching his videos on YouTube I was moved by the Presence of the man. He has a wonderful smile that just melts the sharp edges of one’s personality and worldly worries. He took me to the chancel where people come to meditate and showed me my seat. I felt at home here. The Presence is felt here. We settled in for the meditation and others arrived – Ben, Jason, Nasreen, Laura; forgive me if I have forgotten some or got some mixed up who came later in the week, but the people who come to meditate with John are good souls and bring their own peace, love, and wisdom. Much is shared with the kinsfolk here and one meets people from all over the world: USA, Spain, Lithuania, as well as people from all over Britain.
The meditation was good; one and a half hours of peace, restless mind at times, noticing the Stillness within again, bringing it back, Jesus Prayer, memories, mantra, anxieties about the hotel and finding food, bringing it back again, affirmations, relaxation technique, feeling the Presence, deep prayer…At 5.30pm the meditation came to a close. It was time to meet the others before heading to the hotel in Chesterfield. I was taken by the young people and their enthusiasm and inner peace. I was taken by their positivity, thinking about the world they live in and the joy of being with John. He attracts a wide type of crowd. Talking to them over the week filled me with such hope and peace for our future. They are wonderful. Such deep Presence about them and their desire for a safe and happy world. More to reflect on that later.
Before leaving, John invited us to the upstairs of the Chakra Café at 9.30am the following day to have a two-hour talk. Something else to look forward to. I went to my hotel and drove through beautiful countryside with views of hills and vales and the town of Chesterfield where I would stay for a few days. I ate cold pizza from home and read some John Butler writing.
I arrived for meditation around 6am on a cloudy Tuesday morning. Another deep meditation, interspersed between restless thoughts and anxieties but a good vibe indeed was had that morning. After meditation I sat in the car between showers and read some of John’s poetry before heading back down to the Chakra Lounge for some Satsang with John and other devotees like myself. We ordered drinks and settled around the table. There were about eight of us and John asked if anyone had questions. John talked about meditation, the distraction of talking too much, the attention to the Stillness and Presence within and the process of meditation.
I was sitting right next to John and throughout the morning I felt such an upliftment of the Spirit. My head vibrated with energy. The crown chakra was just tickling and crawling with energy. Honestly it wasn’t lice! I am clean. I was realising this at the time and came to think this was because John was so close. He vibrates with an energy born from his connection to Spirit and his life with the land, working as an organic farmer to help the land. He shares this with others now and now serves the Spirit in people and they come to visit him. His goodness is the power of this attraction. His Spirit is his power of attraction too. One can feel it when one attunes oneself to it. His eyes project this energy when he looks at you. It is a good energy and the source of it is in the Almighty.
Lord Jesus Christ
Son of the Living God
Have Mercy on me a Sinner
John often talks of the Jesus Prayer as the way out of suffering, pain, torment, depression. The Jesus prayer has become a constant friend these past few years, this mantra. There were times when sin was such a difficult thing to get my head around. For a long time I said the Jesus Prayer but left off the last two words! Now it seems such common sense to accept that we all collude in the destruction of life. All we can do is mitigate it as best as possible to protect ourselves from worse outcomes. You can’t possibly be fully human if you can’t embrace the sinful nature of us all. John helped me understand this nature of sin and he taught me a deeper more collective dimension if the concept. John often uses the eastern orthodox insights of these concepts from his time in Russia. The collective nature of sin sits better with me personally than the individualistic understanding of it in the west. Deeper still, sin means turning away from God and that we are in these bodies because we did turn away from the light and that turning back to it, as John says, we enter the grace of God once more and so we feel better and find that peace, Presence and Joy in it all again. We seek good ways of living, good ways of thinking and find that peace in the practice of meditation. The desire to know the real Self and the real nature of being becomes the medicine.
Afterwards I walked with Jason, a good American fellow with passion and energy. We had some good conversations throughout the week. We walked by the River Wye in town, talked by a rocky stream up the hill over Bakewell and sat in cafes over hot chocolate and coffee. John took us on a visit up his holy hill where he would often sit on his bench overlooking the Bakewell landscape. More conversations were had with him while we laid down on the grass of his hill about meditation and Spirit and life. These moments were so intertwined with nature and the places that John often goes to and visits. This place was special because it was where John would play as a boy. His presence was so much part of the landscape. He said he likes to share this place with others. He keeps nothing for himself. In the afternoon we had another meditation and said goodbye to Ben another young fellow from Yorkshire. Spiritual hugs were in abundance this week. Spirit certainly flows through these young people and out into the world making it a better place.
The following day we met at John’s front door and walked to Neil and Alex’s house to be present at a book reading that was being recorded for a podcast. John read from his times in America. He brings the landscape and his spiritual journey there to life. The time just melted away and in between we ate warm bread and butter, chocolate brownies, biscuits and raspberries with teas and coffees. 
Good company and good vibrations were had well. In the afternoon we went on a five hour walk around the fields and vales and hills of Bakewell. We didn’t make the afternoon meditation in church so instead had a group meditation overlooking Bakewell. Infinite completion, as John would say.
The following day was my last morning meditation before heading back to Hampshire. It has been a wonderful time being with John, Neil and Alex and friends from all over the world. I am so blessed and so fortunate to have this five-day Satsang with John and friends. Spiritual hugs all round. And some very tired calf and thigh muscles from all the walking in and around the beautiful town of Bakewell.
What a gift. Thank you all.
